Never Look Back
by hanjuuluver
Summary: yet another FMA fic by yours truly. Ed always told himself never to look back. It's the only thing that kept him sane for so long. So why is it that when he needs to the most, he can't seem to let go? Spoilers for end of series. yaoi. EdRoy. flangt. 1shot
1. Chapter 1

Ok, so I was listening to Panic! At the Disco, and then a vampiric plot bunny bit me in the face and I had to write this flangsty one-shot. Took me a grand total of I think three minutes. Read and enjoy.

Never look back…

Never look back. That had always been my motto. I'd like to think it still is, but I know that it's a lie. For so long it was the act of forgetting, of never looking back, that had kept me sane. Why is it so different now that I'm here? Is it because there's nothing to remind me?

Strange. You'd think that having nothing to remind you of your past would make it easier to forget. It doesn't. If anything it's harder to avoid then ever before. I miss it. I miss the life I had before. Back then, I'd never imagined I'd ever say that, but there it is. And it's true. I miss Al. I miss Winry. I miss Russell and Fletcher. I miss Rose. I miss all my old colleagues (despite being in the military, they were probably some of the best friends I ever had).

But most of all I miss Roy. I tried to never look back. To forget all about him. The trouble with never is it's never worked for me. Except with mom. I've found that's the one mistake that I've been able to avoid since I came here. Because _she's_ always been missing. But Roy was always there by my side. In a different way than Al – Al was there physically; I could always turn around and see him. But Roy was there in a different sense. He was watching me and looking out for me from the shadows. I never told Al this, but once I asked him why he couldn't just leave me alone; why he always had someone tail me wherever I went. Couldn't he just leave me be?

He told me he could never leave me be. It was then that I realized the burning sensation I had whenever I looked at him was not hate. It was love.

Why did I have to love you? If it weren't for you, being apart wouldn't be so painful! I could go on never looking back. It's your fault you know. It's your fault that I can't stop obsessing over a way home. I tell myself the only reason is Al, and that isn't totally a lie, but… But damn it, you bastard! I miss you too! And now I can never STOP looking back.

So much for my motto…

Fin

And that, my friends is the product of instant inspiration and three minutes of typing. Ta da! So how'd you like it? Drop a review and let me know! Heck, you don't even have to say anything. Just type in random words so I know you're out there. Arigato! Ja ne!


	2. I'M SORRY THIS LOOKS LIKE SPAM!

I AM POSTING THIS NOTICE TO ALL MY STORIES BECAUSE IT IS IMPORTANT AND NO ONE SEEMS TO BE LOOKING AT MY PROFILE!!!

I have for some time been thinking about creating a new account, because I feel that I've outgrown "hanjuuluver" for a number of reasons--primarily that my writing style has changed so much it simply doesn't mesh with what I started with, but I don't really want to /erase/ my earlier fics either.

I would have moved to Live Journal, but I'm electronicaly challenged (a sad fate for a 20 year old college student at a tech school--It's most embarrassing) and can't figure out how to work it. As such, I am staying here on , but will be moving to a new account, **Rio Azules** is my new penname. As motivation to go over there, not only will I be posting my new fics there, but in a month or two that will be the only place to read the fanfics that I like from hanjuuluver such as Homecoming, Together in Solitude, For Now and Forever, and many more.

I really hope you all follow me over to my new account, **Rio Azules**, and that you continue to put up with my lameness. Chances are I will never write another chapter fic and will just be contented with occasionally posting one-shots, drabbles, and perhaps the occasional three-shot.

For those of you reading Waiting For You, I'll finish writing that here on hanjuuluver and it may or may not be transferred to Rio Azules later. We'll see.

Thank you all for reading my work as hanjuuluver.


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